Tag Archives: happy

Birthday wishes….

Today is Eric’s 35th Birthday! I wanted to make it special- even though he prefers me not making a big deal out of his birthday! I decided the best way to make it special was to tap I to his deepest desires and wishes…

So, I gave him a Justin Beiber birthday party!!! EPIC!!!!!


Goals for March 25-31, Plus a Tabata Set!

So, I need to seriously up the accountability I have going on. I have caught myself giving in to stress cravings and stressing a little too often lately. Setting some goals and going to make sure I keep notes as I check them off!!

I have to feel good in my body again and get away from the picking and prodding at every little thing. Looking back at my past posts help me remember what I need to be doing!! Ah, so nice to look back so easily thanks to my blog!! So, without further ado, here are the weekly goals!


1. Alter half marathon training plan: Tuesday is a short run (2 fast miles), Thursday is a medium run (4 miles) and Sunday is a long run (6 miles). I’m trying to work on speed with endurance so I’ll see how this goes!

2. Cardio/Strength/Yoga/Tabata: Do one gym cardio session, one shred with yoga meltdown, and one Tabata day with a form of easy cardio.

3. Keep a food journal EVERYDAY: No matter what, keep track. Just do it. Seriously, keep track of everything.

4. Have a ‘boys choice’ art day: Bring out tons of options, lay out a plastic table cloth and just enjoy!!! Don’t worry about a mess, just have fun with them!!!

5. Appt. Goals: Make a doctors appt, a dentist appt, and swap sport massages with the hubby! Our legs are sore and helping each other is a must! He’s up to 15 miles on his long runs, so he will need a deep tissue knuckle rub!

Those are the goals! I PROMISE to post next Sunday with the results and a new set of goals!! Now, onto Tabata!


So, one of the best ways to learn about Tabata workouts is to visit tabatatraining.org. You will get a description, videos, reasons why these are amazing workouts, and proof of what they can do for your health!!! I have incorporated them into my workout routine and have noticed a difference in my speed and my endurance!! 4 minutes of sweat and hard work is harder than you think…I do 4-5 different rounds and am usually DONE by the end. (Done- as in, holy shit, I can’t move).


Here is one example from runninglovingliving

I did a strength training Tabata on Friday for some endurance/resistance work. I use my exercise bands, pull up bar and dumbbells. It was pretty tough and by the time my plank set was done, my arms were jello!!! Here is my set- each round the exercises were repeated for a total of two times each.  I’ll be doing this same one for my goal Tabata of the week!


So now, I have set some goals.  I have talked about Tabata like I promised, and I hope I will get others trying it out and seeing it’s benefits!  There are millions of variations, just make sure you are using a timer (I use Tabata Timer- a free app) and exerting yourself for those 20 seconds of hard work.  It’s pointless if you use those 20 seconds to just march in place or do hip circles.  Do your exercise and really go all out- not to the point of hurting yourself, but enough that you are seriously exerted by the time that 20 seconds is up!!!  It is a great feeling when you are finished, and you really do feel stronger!!! 

Tell me your goals, tell me your Tabata sets!!

A Leap of Faith

So, I’ve been trying to do one thing a day that scares me.  Friday I went to a Military Combat Dining Out…dressed up in camo, got thrown in a tank of water, and was anxious as hell to be in a situation where I could get called out and put in front of everyone.  Leading up to it, I was struggling…I was trying to find every excuse not to go.  I reminded myself to do it BECAUSE it was making me so anxious, and I ended up having a great time.  Today it was all about overcoming a very strong fear I’ve had for YEARS!

I went to the lake with friends yesterday and made the plan to go to the outdoor pool with my boys today!  The main thing I always have to get over is going out in front of others while wearing my bathing suit….yeah, yeah, yeah, I know…get over it!  I have my retro polka dot swim suit granny swimsuit which was supposed to be cute and Marilyn Monroe-ish…but, it is just plain granny-ish!  Either way, I fear swimming and deep water.  Technically I can swim, but when I know the water is deep, I panic and feel like my legs have turned to lead.  I always spend my time watching the boys having fun splashing and jumping around.

First, I played around more than I normally would, and made sure not to be the worrisome party pooper.  Then, I started to watch the others diving into the water and realized I had an opportunity to face the fear once and for all…AND do it in front of my equally scared son!  Eric showed me, toes to the edge, knees together, arms up, lean forward and just let yourself fall into the water.  It was not the most graceful description or display…I basically belly flopped, BUT I did it!  I choked on water, and felt like I was snotting everywhere, but I DID it!!!  Then I tried to just cannon ball….this took about 5 minutes of going to the edge and chickening out!

This may seem so miniscule in terms of action, but this was the first time I ever jumped into water.  I have edged myself in, slowly slid down over an edge, or just waded in until I got to the point where I felt it was too deep.  This was a full on jump in, ass hit the bottom, canon ball!  I was so excited that I did it!!  I then saw James loosen up, get thrown around in the water, paddled his shark to the deep end and flung himself off.  Gavin, who would cry as he got water past his waist, was launching himself off of the blow up shark and even went down the slide a few times!!

It was fantastic to see how perhaps my opening up and facing my fears led my boys to loosen up and just have fun, as well!  I did a good number of jumps and attempted dives today!  We decided that the boys and I will all join swimming lessons together in the fall, and I could not be more excited!!  I have been very proud of the number of things I have done that scare me, and it gives me even more courage to keep going!!  You never know, next time I might just go off the diving board!!!

What is something you’ve done today that scares you???


Overcoming Fears and Getting Back on the Saddle….

So here I am…I promised about a month ago that I was going to get back on a routine and start blogging again.  I enjoy blogging and I enjoy reaching goals I set because my blogging keeps me accountable…well the past month or so have been a bit of a rut for me.  Lots of fears, doubts, insecurities and uncertainties have been taking over my mind/life and now I am ready to face them head on and knock them down!!


A big part of helping me pinpoint what my issues have been, was a post I saw on one of my favorite blogs.  Angela at Oh She Glows, decided to turn August into a Challenge Month…“Do one thing a day that scares you”.  At first, I was not really thinking it applied to me, but this week I realized it absolutely does apply to me.


So I spent an hour at 4:00am, thinking about what fears have been doing to control me lately…there are a lot of them!  I was fearful of blogging again and sharing my experiences with healthy eating and exercise, because I have fallen into old habits…that being my Binge Eating Disorder.  Basically, I get stressed/overwhelmed and then go on a frenzy when I binge eat, feel horrible, lay on the guilt and belittle myself for hours/days.  This battle of going back and forth has caused me to lose any confidence I had in my body and has led to an 8 pound weight gain.  I am having a mini anxiety attack just writing this and putting it out there.  It makes me feel like a fraud when I promote all kinds of healthy ideals and then crumble when I feel overwhelmed.  Well this is me overcoming that fear of rejection, failure, and being judged for putting on a few pounds.  On a positive note, I have been running and training for a half marathon on October 7th.  I have been sticking to my schedule and promising to maintain this hard work so I can focus on those successes instead of the little things that feel like failures.  Focus on miles, not pounds!


I have been scared of voicing the areas I feel like I failing or not standing up for myself!  I have been taken advantage of at times and have not stood my ground as best as I could for fear of what would happen.  It has led me to a place where I have allowed myself to be excluded and left out of some big things.  This week that really changed.  I hit my breaking point and spent two days in utter mental turmoil.  I could not wrap my head around the path I should take or how to get past the things that were holding me down and leaving me feeling stuck.  I faced that fear today by going to counseling and laying my struggles out on the table.  I refused to hold guilt for others indiscretions and I refused to let those things cripple me any longer.  I laid out my expectations and what I wanted to happen in order for my life to move forward in a positive and functional manner.  It felt good to stand up for myself and hold others accountable, it was liberating to see that I wasn’t attacked or ignored for doing this.  I am now going to work everyday at being sure I am treated equal to my worth while standing up for myself and the life I deserve! 


Last but not least, I have decided to stop fearing the challenges involved with getting my “American” degrees and getting the teaching job I want.  I cannot be scared that I will not be good enough or capable enough.  I have always taught kindergarten and elementary students, but I will now be studying to teach middle and high school English.   I cannot settle for something less than I have always dreamed of because it seems so challenging to get there.  I am going to take the challenges and crazy roadblocks in order to get the outcome I truly want.  I am going to be patient with it and know that all of the struggles will pay off in the long run.  I am swallowing that big pill that comes with trying to change my Canadian education into an American teaching license, and I am going to do the monkey dance they are asking of me.  My goals are worth the pain in the ass hoops I have to jump through.  I am taking some tests and doing whatever I can to speed up the process while I have the time to do it.


What I am setting right now are goals that I am going to stick to so I can get past all of these insecurities and bits of anxiety.

  1. I will blog tomorrow with my exercise and meal plan so I will do my best to overcome binge eating relapses.  Due to a nasty stomach bug I am re-scheduling my 3.5 training run from tonight to tomorrow morning where I will hopefully not be plagued with an upset stomach.  I will go back in time and look at how I used to eat for health and energy rather than a need to lose weight fast. 
  2. I will study for a CLEP test so I can get some Literature credits knocked out of the way.
  3. I will spend the night ‘chilling out’ and not talking about ‘stresses’ as per my therapist, as a way to just remember how to spend time doing what I enjoy without fear, guilt or obligation to finish tasks from the day
  4. I will go do something immature and fun with my boys without worrying about getting dirty or being loud…suggestions welcome!

I will blog at the end of the day tomorrow to be accountable and take that step forward to fulfill my little goals one at a time…thanks in advance for listening and being a part of my jump out of the fog!!!



5 Things I would tell my younger self…

As per a post on ‘Listable Life’s’ blog, I am going to take a prompt and write about 5 things I would tell my younger self.  I am pretty sure I could list at least 95 extra things, but I can keep that long winded rant to myself (you’re welcome)!  So here we go…

1.  HAIR: Just because it was forced upon you for a good few years, do not feel the need to continue with a mushroom cut.  No, seriously…ditch that NOW!  It does NOT go well with your buck teeth and flat chest.  It is honestly just something that should have been banned for girls…hell, even for boys!  Remember to trim as you are growing out the mushroom cut, because if you don’t, you end up with an unfortunate mullet!  You will get a perm for your 12th birthday and suddenly be transformed into a girl….oh perm, you make me want to be a better person!  Then you take a step backwards again when you go all out with the ‘Sackville Bangs’…it is okay, this will pass and you will have some good hair days, again!





2.  Enjoy your pregnancies and know that you are making two amazing boys.  Stop worrying about the weight, stop worrying that you look ‘fat’, stop worrying that people are going to think you gained too much weight and look fat.  Don’t complain about losing the weight, don’t complain about stretch marks, just be thankful you can carry these two healthy boys and have the strength and good health to deliver them into the world!

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3.  Stand up for yourself.  Do not be intimidated because you are smaller than others.  Do not worry that people will not like you.  Do not worry you will get your ass kicked (because you do and then you are perfectly fine without a mark on you).  When someone gets in your face, tries to take advantage of you, tries to bully you, tries to force you to do something you don’t want to…go ahead and get ‘SACKVILLE’ right back at them.  Don’t take shit from anyone because it doesn’t help you.  Respect everyone until they give you a reason not to, BUT be sure you don’t get walked over in the process.  You are targeted because you are easily persuaded and don’t talk back…thicken your skin!  The problems are not YOURS, the problems are THEIRS and when you are older you will become an unfiltered, kind, funny, outspoken, not-taking-any-shit, mother, teacher and wife!  IT GETS BETTER!

4.  Leaving Korea early in 2003 was worth the trouble…don’t worry about the judgments or the consequences, it all works out!  Don’t stress about finding work right away, don’t worry about making a good impression, just know that you followed your heart and it was the right thing to do!  There is nothing wrong with meeting a guy in a Korean bar…he just might end up being your husband, the father of your two children, your own father’s prodigal son, and your world travelling partner!  You will have a lot of heartbreak together, a lot of struggles and tests, a lot of stressful times, but you will never be more loved or cared for!


5.  Always follow your heart.  Never give up on a dream because you cannot see ‘how’ it can come true.  Don’t underestimate the things you can do!  Stop forgetting your worth, you are the world to some very awesome little boys!  Hand written letters are still amazing in 2012, so still write them just like Nanny taught you!  Be thankful everyday and give gratitude for every problem you encounter!  Praise every little thing about others, it might be exactly what they need to feel their own worth and turn their day around!  Remember that your students usually love you as much as you love them and it is okay to cry when you leave them despite what others might say.  You will reach a point in your life where you will raise two boys who have the same behavior and sarcasm you do….it is okay that is pisses you off sometimes…your Dad thinks this is hilarious and you owe him that joy!  Tell people how much you love them, hug often, accept compliments and remember them, trust your judgment and know that you are going to turn out to be pretty amazing!

What 5 things would you tell your younger self?

A Happy Reunion…

Today was the day that I have been waiting for!  The day that I can run after my injury…damn you peroneal tendon!  The morning did not turn out the way I wanted to since Gavin had a rough night.  The plan was to go run 2 refreshing interval miles with my girls and then enjoy some coffee at the Brit Café…instead, I ended up on my treadmill in an empty room.  Ah well, I got to run and that was all that mattered to me!!  I was able to reunite two old friends of mine…my treadmill with my Nike Free Runs.  Since the injury I am going to SLOWLY use my vibrams and incorporate them into my training little by little…until then, Nike Frees it is!


I started with a 4 minute warm-up and then split my run into 3:1 intervals.  I ran the first interval at 5.3mph and then each interval I sped up.  I made it up to 6.6mph, which is very fast for me.  I was sure to make the most of this H.I.I.T Run since I need to get endurance and speed back after these 20 days of no running.  I felt a bit gassed, but I always fall quickly if I take breaks/time without running.  I felt myself feeling tired more quickly than I normally would have.  What was my solution when I wanted to even stop during one of my teeny 3 min intervals???  I sped up and repeated “Soft feet, strong legs” in my head!


Even though I had some speedy intervals, I only ended up with an average 12:28mile…that is the 1 minute walking coming into play…Next time I am going to do 1.5 miles with no intervals, and then 2 miles with no intervals.  I am going to work on distance before I really worry too much about speed.  Speed will come with more cross-training and strength.  In the meantime, I am going to enjoy every minute of my training and be so thankful for it!!!  Whew, I am so relieved I am running again!!


Being able to run again isn’t the only thing I am thankful for….but, more on that tomorrow!!

New gear, motivation, and yummy treats!

So since it is getting colder and I was recently treated to some cold-gear, I realized I will be needing MORE cold gear!  I was looking around for some good items and then saw a few things at Old Navy that are not necessarily for the cold, but will work for the time being.  I plan on getting some thermal pants from our Outdoor Rec, and some more items from Santa!  Another realization came today…I can create my own adrenaline rush in order to get hyped for a workout when I am actually feeling dead on my feet!  PLUS, I want to share some of my favorite snacks that leave me feeling happy not heavy!


But first, the new gear I am going to try out, and am hoping works well!  I was browsing and saw that Old Navy actually has a new line of clothing for their active wear.  They are selling some highly rated compression pants, tights, tops and jackets.  Since I have issues with my legs, I have been wanting to really give these a ‘go’.  The fact that there was a 25% off sale on the items made me feel even more inclined to go ahead with the purchase!  Here is what I chose:

All three of these are the compression items.  When looking through the reviews, many people bought multiples of each item because of the great fit and quality.  Others commented that they have worn these in colder temperatures and have faired quite well!  I know it looks blah that I got all black, but I also have a few other items that are more colorful!  I am looking forward to using these for my running, hiking and my yoga/pilates classes that I will be teaching in my village (one weekly public class, and some private sessions).  I will be sure to report on these items as soon as I get them and have a chance to try them out!  In the meantime, go check them out for yourself and see if you think Old Navy is onto something good!  Now onto the purchases from Road Runner Sports!  I love these guys because being a VIP really DOES pay off.  Free speedy shipping, discounts on everything and there are always extra bonuses and specials!  Oddly enough the shirt I picked out and bought ended up as a recommendation from my Running Group and so now three of us will be sporting this bad boy for our runs!

Womens Brooks EZ T Run Happy Long Sleeve No Zip Technical Tops

I also got their compression sleeves to wear on my legs so I can get some relief from the calf and shin pain I seem to always suffer from.  The difference between now and 5 months ago is that I know it is just my legs getting used to these new miles + shoes, and I am not giving in!  I am icing and heating these bad boys, I am going to be taping them, and slipping them into these compression sleeves so the muscles heal faster in between runs.  I am sticking to my training and enjoying the muscle pain because I know it means I am working hard and pushing my body past the point of giving up!  Sorry suckas, you are not going to see me give in this time!

Zensah Compression Leg Sleeves Injury Recovery

Hooray for new gear!  I will be waiting by the PO Box everyday!!  Now onto a little motivation for a tiring Saturday morning!  The hub was working (again), and after a horrible night sleep we both agreed that if there were a championship for tossing/turning, we would have won by a landslide!  I knew I had some strength/cross-training on the schedule for today, so I planned on a double dose of Jillian!  One round of the Shred and then Level 2 of Yoga Meltdown.  As I watched the time tick away this morning…well until about 9:30, I realized that I should just do the workout and hope for rest afterwards.  I jumped around a bit, put my workout clothes on, grabbed yoga blocks (for the boys to play with) and an extra yoga mat so the boys could work out with me.  I tried to get them super excited so I would also get excited…it worked well!


We were pumped and ready to go….until Gavin crapped out after the Shred.  He went for a nap, then James drifted off to do some Jump Start Learning on the computer…ah well, I finished strong on my own!  It made me feel really good to get the workout done and not put it off until ‘later’!  I also felt better about it because 30  minutes before I did the workouts I ate a little bit more trail mix than I needed!  I love trail mix, but it leaves my belly feeling heavy!  My treats of choice these days are therefore in the lighter category…

Tofu Pudding

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Protein Balls Truffles

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No Bake Chocolate Puff Truffles

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…and Toasted Whole Wheat Pita chips with Natural PB and banana

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So there you have it!!!  Some new gear I will review as soon as I get it, how I got my arse motivated to do my double workout this morning despite being exhausted (gotta love my boys), and some yummy treats that leave me feeling satisfied without a heavy belly!

What snacks do you favor?  What is a good way to get yourself motivated when you really don’t want to workout?  Any new gear or goodies that have you excited?