Weekly Goals update and Mommy’s Worst Fear…

So I have my treadmill…and I also have shin splints.  Thanks to myself for running 5 days out of 7 right off the bat after not running for 6 weeks.  I am guessing that would be enough to cause that horrific pain in the legs!  This week I decided to take it easy with the running and do some hill intervals along with some workouts from my Oxygen Magazine.

oxygen

 

My goals for this week were to: (I forgot to post these)

1.  Eat Clean each day with one small indulgence the first two days in order to avoid completely shocking my system. 

2.  To work out 5 days with some cardio, resistance, and to try at least 2 new workouts! 

3.  To talk to someone about my anxiety and see if I cannot set up bi-weekly appointments to help me deal with stress. 

4.  To keep it together while Gavin gets tubes and to also plan a fun day for us on Saturday.

The Results

Eat Clean- I did very well with this.  I had 3 hershey kisses on Monday, which I allowed into my meal planning.  Then on Tuesday I had a surprise visit from a neighbor with a cheesecake.  Rather than eating a large piece and throwing in the towel for the rest of the day, I had a small little slice and then continued with my clean eating the rest of the day!  Normally I would have tail-spinned into an over-eating frenzy!  I have kept it clean every day, not treats, no extra snacking, no junk, no NOTHING!!  I have felt a lot better this week in terms of my belly!!  I finally got my chia seeds and flax seeds, so I added those in.  The first two days after flax I was a bit bloated from the change, but still feeling really good!

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Workout- Monday: I did a 45 minute hill interval workout on my treadmill, followed by a shoulder and squat workout.  Tuesday:  I was feeling a little sick but I did a Turbo Jam workout, plus tons of stretching from Yoga poses.  Wednesday: I did a 45 minute hill interval workout, plus a new workout from Oxygen using the band for a full body blast!  Thursday- I did Plyo from the Oxygen Magazine (fast workout but man it is a killer).  Friday –REST.  Saturday- I will do a 30 minute walk outdoors with Gavin, followed by soccer drills (running the field dribbling the ball, squat jumps, jumping jacks, lunge twists and then abs.  Sunday- I am going to do a Yoga workout.

 

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Anxiety- I spoke to someone yesterday (Friday) about my anxiety and how I am having a lot of anxiety attacks these days.  No matter how much exercise I am doing, writing in my journal, getting outside, or following a routine- this anxiety is NOT giving me a break.  I am constantly in a state of mild panic and impatience.  I know that it is not healthy and it is making everyday life for my family equally difficult.  I will be going to see a counselor every two weeks while doing some exercises to help me in between appointments.  I also started taking some anti-anxiety medication at an extremely low dose for a set short term basis.  Not going to feel bad about it, I know something has got to give.

Keep it together for Gavin- Everyday was great except Thursday!  Thursday was a TOUGH day!  Gavin was not feeling nap time, he was (I am guessing) testing his new and improved hearing abilities by screaming all day…literally, all day!  Not out of anger or frustration, just because he could hear it (again, I am guessing this is the reason).  By mid-afternoon I was in tears with a screaming (pun) headache and James was saying he didn’t want ‘this baby’ anymore.  We went for a drive, went for a walk, played with his little friend next door, played outside…all the while he was just screaming and screeching his little heart out.  I was exhausted, emotional and wanted to just go to bed.  My husband didn’t get home until 9pm and by that time I was way passed wanting to sit and recap the day, a little bickering took place because of my ‘downer mood’ and then I cut the conversation to go to bed!  (I think Gavin was still drugged while eating this pudding…what do you say?)

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Plan a fun day for Saturday….well, that took a painful nose dive!  James and Eric went to look at a second car last night (Friday night) with our neighbor.  The car was an hour from our home, so about 1.5 hours from the nearest base.  They left at 8pm and I went to bed thinking I would see them around 10pm.  Nope.  Instead there was a knock on the door (followed by my psycho Shih Tzu barking like mad) and an Airman standing on my doorstep at midnight to tell me I needed to call the Control Center in order to get a message from my husband.  Something about our kid being in the hospital…SAY WHAT??!!???? 

Yes!  Long story short, James was playing with the guy’s (who owns the car) dogs and while he was playing catch his body twisted, he legs stayed planted and he was knocked down by the dog…you see where I am going with this?  My 6 year old is laid up in a German hospital with a spiral fracture to his lower left leg…bone is broke clear in half.  He has a cast straight up to his thigh and is in a German hospital and is being kept there until Sunday or Monday (at least)…he cannot even move and is in extreme pain.

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I have been keeping as calm as possible, trying to breathe deep and know that a calm mommy is more helpful than a weepy mommy right now!  Besides I have pictures like the one below to make me (and James)smile.  This was him Friday morning when he woke up.  He told me that he kept his “Marty McFly” vest on all night and brushed his hair to the side so he could look just like Marty….gotta respect Back to the Future!! 

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Here is to hopes of my son’s pain diminishing (A LOT) and him having a speedy recovery without surgery!  Here is to hopes of me being a strong and comforting mom, and maintaining my efforts to beat anxiety despite all things stressful.  I am not going to binge, overeat and make myself sick like I normally would in a stressful situation.  I am going to prove to myself and my boys (all three of them) that I can keep it together and be the support system THEY need, just like they are for me when I need it!

Anything crazy happen to you this week?  Ever broke a bone (or have a child with a broken bone)?  How do you best handle yourself when someone you love is in extreme pain?

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2 responses to “Weekly Goals update and Mommy’s Worst Fear…

  1. Oh no!! I’m so sorry about your little guy. That looks scary and awful. 😦

    Anxiety is the worst. It rears it’s ugly head at the first times.

  2. Oh, the poor little guy! Amanda, I’ve been meaning to tell you this for a while but I’ve never gotten around to doing so. I’ve been keeping up with your blog since I found it a few months ago. I have to tell you that from our conversations in Okinawa and through reading your posts, your philosophies and the way you approach life have inspired me and helped me to (try to) be more introspective. You are one of the most self-aware people I have had the pleasure of meeting. I have a feeling that you’re more together than you may realize. So hang in there!

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